When living just isn't enough
by Asami-chann
Summary: For a shinobi,living just isn't enough.Groupof1shots.Latest:Killed in action.If only I was there, I could have saved her. I could have helped her. I could have loved her. I watched, as Kakashi stood in front of the memorial for an extra 2 hours then usual
1. The last shinobi

**Title: The last shinobi**

**Author: x.OAsami.MatsudaO.x (me of course!)**

**Summary: He had always been left behind, the only one left. His genin teams and everyone else he cared for were dead. He could stand for hours thinking about them, remembering everything that they had done for him. Every time any of them came to his head he just felt like bursting into tears, but he would not, as he had to stand up for his village.**

He had always been left behind, the only one left. His genin teams and everyone else he cared for were dead. He could stand for hours thinking about them, remembering everything that they had done for him. Every time any of them came to his head he just felt like bursting into tears, but he would not, as he had to stand up for his village. Rain poured down on him, like the clouds were going to stay over the village for ever.

His feet shuffled, the long grass tickling at his toes as he walked on, remembering the pain and hurt he felt so many years ago. He felt tears prickling at the corners of his eyes, pain stabbing his heart. He always had someone to lean on, and now, he never expected any of his teammates to survive a mission. He refused to go on team missions so he couldn't put anyone else's life in danger. He didn't want to live with another death on his shoulders. He lowered his head, falling to his knees in despair, gripping his pants with his gloved hands.

He remembered his team well, his sensei, the Uchiha and the medic. He couldn't forget them. History repeats itself so many times over it hurts. He stood in front of the memorial, staring at the three people whom he missed the most in the miserable world. It has never been the same since his sensei died, though he left his legacy, his legacy only mistreated as he wasn't known as his son, not that it was hard to tell.

He traced his fingers over the three names, wishing there was some way to bring them back, some way to revive them. It was his fault they died, he wasn't strong enough. He wasn't physically ready, or mentally stable. He had let his guard down, his team dying because of him. He thought back, trying to remember who the others were that had died because of him. His hand traced along every name, believing that if he was somewhat stronger at the time of their death, he could have saved them. Why was he that weak then? Why couldn't he have been stronger?

Fate. Fate was the only thing that could decide it. As much as he wanted to believe against it, fate controlled everything and no matter what he did, his fate might alter, but never change completely. It was the only thing that could stop him, the only thing that made him the way he was.

He looked around, his body dreading the lack of sleep that was ringing in his head, his body weak and dreary. He took several paces toward the Hokage Mansion, each step revealing the rokudaime face from the rocky mountain behind. He could have stared at the face all day. The first 6 Hokages were dead, time eating away at the mountain. In the group of academy students from many years ago, only one was still alive, the war raging on for a few days but dying off, along with the second last to die. He should have been helping at the war, but he couldn't face the chance that his presence could kill so many more he knew.

His feet slid through the wet grass, the paths flooding with water. It had been raining since the day _that _happened. The day the war ended, the town was expecting the rain to disappear, but nothing happened. The rain had raged on for almost a week now, many shops needing to close down due to lack of sales. People who lived in the southern area had to move into the cavern behind the Hokage faces for shelter, their land flooding.

Was it never going to end? The nanadaime was already chosen, the one who would lead the village to safety and end the rain. He sat down on a bench, staring at the Hokage faces. He drowsed into a light sleep, light filling his eyes.

"_Hey. Are you listening or not?" A voice echoed in his head. The masculine 23 year old male standing in front of him, a katana dug into the ground, smiling at him genuinely. _

"_Why…Why are you here?" He asked. The male laughed, his blonde hair shining brightly. _

"_Because you are neglecting your village," The male said, several other people stood around him, each he recognized._

"_Those who cannot complete a mission are trash," One said, his voice echoing from the back._

"_But those who can't save their friends are worse than trash," a 23 year old girl said from the front, "You taught us that," He couldn't help but smile. Almost all of those he cared about so much were right here._

"_We may be dead but we are still watching over you, protecting you," An even more familiar voice echoed that he had longed to hear. He stood up, looking over everyone. There was Konoha's white fang and each Hokage but one was standing there, ready to wake him up from this hopeless reality that he thought he lived. Finally, the last one stepped forward from the background, a 13 year old male and a medic in which he remembered dearly._

"_We are counting on you," said the Hokage who was last to step forward. He smiled, happy to have seen those he cared about again. He nodded, closing his eyes, feeling warmth cover his face._

He smiled. The rain slowed, rain slowing and stopping, the clouds parting on the Hokage faces and the memorial.

He laid his head back on his hands, remembering all those who had died. Maito Gai, Rock Lee, Ten-ten, Hyuuga Neji, Yuuhi Kurenai, Hyuuga Hinata, Inuzuka Kiba, Aburame Shino, Sarutobi Asuma, Nara Shikamaru, Akimichi Choji, Gaara, Temari, Kankuro, the first, nindaime, sandaime, Tsunade-sama, Iruka, Mitarashi Anko, Morino Ibiki, Haruno Sakura, Uchiha Sasuke, Rin, Uchiha Obito, Arashi-sensei and Uzumaki Naruto. All of them gone because of the war or other causes before hand. The only ones left were Yamanaka Ino, Shizune and Jaraiya, because Ino was already sick and couldn't fight though she helped in the hospital when she is needed, Shizune because she still assisted the Hokages, no one finding anyone who could assist the Hokage any better, and Jaraiya out searching about Akatsuki _still._

He looked at the 6 Hokage faces and a bit that were carved into the mountain behind the Hokage tower. He smiled as he looked at the 5th, reminding him of Tsunade, who had died from over using her jutsu, then he looked at the 6th, looking at Naruto's face in scripted on the mountain. He had only been Hokage for a few weeks, dying from saving his village, the massive impact of his raseshurkien. Finally, he looked at the 4th, his sensei's face reminding him of his team and the greatest lesson he had ever learned and taught to all of his students.

He stood up, his white Hokage robe flicking behind him in the gentle wind as he stood adjusting the headdress so he could see the sun shining on his face. He walked over to the Hokage mansion, taking a seat at his desk, a clear view of Konohagakure at his fingertips. He heard a knock at his door, the door opening slightly, and a small child creeping in and jumping onto his lap. The silver haired child, looked out at Konoha, smiling.

"Someday I am going to be a Hokage like you Otousan," the child said happily. He smiled at his son.

"I am sure you will," He said, the child hugging him tightly, "Now go to find your mother." The child smiled as he got off and ran out the door again. He smiled as he watched his son leave, turning back to stare at Konohagakure.

It had almost been 24 hours since his _vision _of his old comrades, friends. He turned his chair, looking over his desk. He felt his frozen breath on his hands as they sat under his chin, resting on his desk, closing his eyes for a moment. He heard a crash and felt the earth beneath him shake, an earthquake knocking things off his desk, the only thing breaking was a picture of him and his family. He rushed to the door, crashing it open, the walls shaking. Several ninja were heading in the same direction, watching the Hokage rushing down towards the area of the crash.

"Hokage-sama, the crash was from the east side of the village," Shizune said, running at his side. He sped up, running at his top speed. He was at the east side of Konohagakure. He noticed several ninja crowding outside a certain house, one he knew too well. He kicked the door down, looking at 2 bodies laying on the ground, both stabbed in numerous places. He fell to his knees, Shizune trying to assist the two fallen people.

"D-Do-Don't worry," he stuttered, holding back tears, "It's too late." He walked outside, brushing his hands over his knees as he looked at a ninja, holding the offending ninja under his arms.

"There didn't seem to be any deaths. Only a few people with a few cuts and scrapes," The ninja said, before noticing the Hokage's gaze, "there was, wasn't there."

"Aa…" the Hokage said, "My wife and son."

He stood back, looking over Konohagakure, remembering all that he had inside. He was the Hokage, 38 years old and yet, he still called himself young. His silver hair squashed by the headdress as he looked over the village that he cared for, watching each light turn off individually. He turned to the memorial, looking at each of the names. He remembered their smiling faces and the tears that they cried. He remembered moments that had made him smile, though he rarely showed it. He felt guilt slightly tug but he knew inside it shouldn't be there. He sighed, looking at the Hokage faces again, reflecting.

Kakashi Hatake had always been left behind, the only one left. His genin teams and everyone he cared for were dead. He could stand for hours thinking about them, remembering everything that they had done for him. In the past, every time any of them came to his head he just felt like bursting into tears, but he would not, as he had to stand up for his village. Now, every time any of them came to his head, he would smile, remembering what they had meant to him and how they were counting on him to save Konohagakure…

**Please review with what you think!!!!**

**Asami Matsuda**


	2. Killed in action

**Title: Killed in action.**

**Author: x.OAsami.MatsudaO.x (me of course!)**

**Summary: If only I was there, I could have saved her. I could have helped her. I could have loved her. I watched, as Kakashi stood in front of the memorial for an extra 2 hours then usual. This would become the normal.**

I watched, as Kakashi stood in front of the memorial for an extra 2 hours then usual. This would become the normal. Once he left I walked over, searching down the list, remembering her dearly, her soft face and unique smile.

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_If only I was there…_

_I could have saved her._

_I could have helped her._

_I could have loved her._

_I could have… I could have…_

_If I had made it in time, all of my team could still be alive, together and happy. _

_If I hadn't left her alone, she would still be alive._

My hand brushed against her cold cheek.

Why was she dead? Because I wasn't there to save her.

Kakashi-sensei put a hand on my frozen shoulder, his warm skin making me tremble.

Tears flowed off my cheeks and onto her face. Even when she was dead she looked peaceful yet strong enough to punch a building into dust.

Naruto was sitting down on the wet grass, his hands wrapped around his knees as he rocked back and forward, tears flowing from his cheeks. He had watched the act of her murder, the murderer himself.

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_Naruto's rasengan swirled around his palm. Itachi Uchiha stood in front of my body, staring over him with disgust. I stood as Naruto ran forward, swinging his rasengan toward Itachi._

_Naruto tried to stop as I stood in front of Naruto's aim, unintentionally but was going to be a fatal hit, no matter how fast I could move. _

'_DAMMIT!' Naruto cried, trying to pull away._

"_SASUKE!!!!" Sakura cried to me, my body trying to turn but it couldn't, just watching Naruto's rasengan draw closer. _

_I was going to die and nobody could help. I was frozen to the spot, Sakura's tears already starting to break the surface of her eyes. She stood quickly, appearing in front of me, taking Naruto's rasengan to her chest. She was so light yet strong, her thin body just absorbing the blue chakra blow. Itachi stepped back, watching me as my eyes widened._

_I turned, catching her body in my arms; her body messed up from the impact. Tears prickled at her cheeks, my hands wiping them from her face._

_She didn't deserve to die, nor did I deserve to survive…_

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I couldn't help but blame myself that she was dead.

I held Sakura's body in my arms. She was dead because of me… dead to save a traitor. Itachi had already disappeared. It wasn't his fault that I couldn't save her. I wasn't strong enough to beat him. She was the kunoichi of team 7 and team Kakashi, Tsunade's apprentice, not that it mattered now.

I brushed my hands over her face, wiping the pastel pink hair from her emerald eyes. I put one hand over them, closing them over, feeling something wet on my hands. It was a final tear, the final tear Sakura would ever shed.

Naruto was still in a ball, rocking back and forth. He was going to be in a horrible mental state when we returned to Konoha.

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We walked into Tsunade's office, drenched in blood, sweat and tears, but not in a good way. Naruto was shaking so much that Kakashi had to carry him back, Sakura's limp body being held in my own.

"Uchiha, Uzumaki, Haruno, Hatake! Report!" Tsunade said. Kakashi put Naruto down, Naruto standing wobbly on his own feet.

I put Sakura down on the floor, her body just laying so limp and helpless.

"Mission failed. Sa…" Kakashi began.

"Sakura Haruno, killed in action…" I said, holding back sobs.

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I, Sasuke Uchiha, watched, as Kakashi stood in front of the memorial for an extra 2 hours then usual. This would become the normal. Once he left I walked over, searching down the list, remembering her dearly, her soft face and unique smile.

I read her name aloud.

Sakura Haruno. Killed in action.


End file.
